Monday, April 9, 2012

An empty house is not a home

It was hard taking down the pictures in the house. All the memories. I would have left them up till who knows when but this morning when I logged in, I received a note from an estate manager that I had to take down the ban lines on my land and that they would provide me with a security orb. Then when I contacted an estate manager, I was told that all their security orbs wasn't working. So I said, "Great thank you." I was thinking to myself, if their security orbs weren't working, why the hell was it offered ? I didn't want strangers traipsing all over my land because it was next to shops. I could buy my own I guess, but it's this kind of business manipulation that I hate.  Why offer it if it's not working?
I still have 3 weeks left on the land so for now it'll just be an empty house. Just like how I'm feeling right now. I have no idea what I'm going to do next. Carry on renting or not.
*update, I got my security orb last night, 11/4

This is no virtual game, I can't restart again. Just like in rl, this virtual life, I have to  ride the wave and hope I don't crash. Sure we can kill people and they'd still live but they still feel anger when they lost the fight. Yeah, we feel pleasure when we f**k our lover even if it's just all pretend or acting or roleplaying or whatever we wanna call it. We feel humiliated, betrayed, lonely, exluded... all the feelings we would feel in rl and for those masochistic people, a place to feed their ego because they know we would feel what they want us to feel.
Why am I writing this? Sometimes, when I write, things becomes clearer.
I don't need to be in a roleplay and pretend to be somebody else in this virtual life. Should I care what people think of me? No. It is, afterall, another extention of myself. Perhaps the darker part of me that I would not allow myself to experience in rl.